How did this happen?? I have become a HUGE pessimist. I don't want to be, but every time I look at a glass, it's half empty. I haven't always been like this, and in the future I don't want to be, but for right now....I am.
On that note, I am heading back to the working world. If anyone knows of a great job for someone who has a Psychology degree (but hasn't used it since my first internship where I learned the state of TN cares more about pushing paper through the system than counseling troubled children, and on top of that they pay pennies...), who is anal retentive about organization and knows how to deal with difficult doctors and patients, please let me know :)
Saturday, April 26, 2008
Comparisons
Comparisons...do we really need them?? My kid does this, your kid does that...who is normal? Is there a normal?
I understand we need a spectrum to understand the difference between excellence and failure, but my child does not need to be your level of normalcy or not. In the short time I have been a mother there is one thing I know for sure, they learn EVERYTHING on their own and at their own speed. As frustrating as that is, I can't do anything about it...as much as I want to. They all bring different gifts to the table and they all have their own struggles. My child walked way before his cousins, but took longer to point. My child still likes to eat #3 baby food, but babbles more than his cousin...who is normal? My child still wants water in a bottle when he is sick when he goes to bed, but my nieces still have pacifiers, which Taylor does not have. My child is very large for his age, but my niece is tiny...does that make us bad mothers? I know it doesn't, but sometimes in public we may feel like it.
I say this because the next time you want to comment on someones baby or child in public, think first before you say it. I have a friend who has a bigger baby who gets the same comments I do and I have a friend whose child is talking a lot for his age, who also is nervous about it. We all get "those" looks, and as much as we want them to be, no child is perfect. You can have six of one and half dozen of the other, but that doesn't make it any different. We need to understand that they are children, they make their own rules and as much as we want to understand them or even write them for them, we can't. God created them perfect in HIS eyes and they all are.
That doesn't mean I don't want to hear about your child or what they are doing. I am talking about the people that make comments in public and the family you don't see very often or aren't very close to that have their own opinions. That also doesn't mean I have any clue what I am talking about or doing...but I'm a new mother, at least I can blame it on that :)
I understand we need a spectrum to understand the difference between excellence and failure, but my child does not need to be your level of normalcy or not. In the short time I have been a mother there is one thing I know for sure, they learn EVERYTHING on their own and at their own speed. As frustrating as that is, I can't do anything about it...as much as I want to. They all bring different gifts to the table and they all have their own struggles. My child walked way before his cousins, but took longer to point. My child still likes to eat #3 baby food, but babbles more than his cousin...who is normal? My child still wants water in a bottle when he is sick when he goes to bed, but my nieces still have pacifiers, which Taylor does not have. My child is very large for his age, but my niece is tiny...does that make us bad mothers? I know it doesn't, but sometimes in public we may feel like it.
I say this because the next time you want to comment on someones baby or child in public, think first before you say it. I have a friend who has a bigger baby who gets the same comments I do and I have a friend whose child is talking a lot for his age, who also is nervous about it. We all get "those" looks, and as much as we want them to be, no child is perfect. You can have six of one and half dozen of the other, but that doesn't make it any different. We need to understand that they are children, they make their own rules and as much as we want to understand them or even write them for them, we can't. God created them perfect in HIS eyes and they all are.
That doesn't mean I don't want to hear about your child or what they are doing. I am talking about the people that make comments in public and the family you don't see very often or aren't very close to that have their own opinions. That also doesn't mean I have any clue what I am talking about or doing...but I'm a new mother, at least I can blame it on that :)
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Funny how it all works out
4 am...not when I thought I would be up, but it's okay. My child woke up screaming and I think he is having bad dreams. Growing up, I dealt with sleep walking and talking. I even still talk to Dustin sometimes in my sleep and I've been known to carry on full conversations and even get angry at times, though I don't think I've done it since I've been pregnant with Taylor. I did that alot when I was pregnant and some of you have heard those funny stories... So I think poor Taylor is having bad dreams. He wakes up and all he wants to do is cuddle.
At 4 am, any person in their right mind would be irritated and aggitated, but not me. This is the only time my 19 month old, go ALL the time, NEVER stop, little boy will cuddle up to me. He reaches around my neck and wants to put his little head on my shoulder. We'll sit in the glider in his room and I'll rock him, and while I used to be able to hold him up while I rocked him, now he sits on my lap and is still able to cuddle up with me. He's so big...
He calms down and he looks up at me and gives me that million dollar smile and tells me "hi" and I know he is ready to go back to bed. I'll give him his water bottle and lay him down with his stuffed frog, and all is well with his world.
Funny how it all works out...my child wakes up upset, and I enjoy the time of cuddling. I've always heard that with all bad things in life, there is something good, I guess having a child helped me to see it more clearly.
At 4 am, any person in their right mind would be irritated and aggitated, but not me. This is the only time my 19 month old, go ALL the time, NEVER stop, little boy will cuddle up to me. He reaches around my neck and wants to put his little head on my shoulder. We'll sit in the glider in his room and I'll rock him, and while I used to be able to hold him up while I rocked him, now he sits on my lap and is still able to cuddle up with me. He's so big...
He calms down and he looks up at me and gives me that million dollar smile and tells me "hi" and I know he is ready to go back to bed. I'll give him his water bottle and lay him down with his stuffed frog, and all is well with his world.
Funny how it all works out...my child wakes up upset, and I enjoy the time of cuddling. I've always heard that with all bad things in life, there is something good, I guess having a child helped me to see it more clearly.
It takes all kinds...
It's 4 am and I just got up with a screaming child. I would say baby, but once I picked him up, I realized how un-baby he was. He is getting so big... Anyway, that is not the point. When I got him up out of his bed, we headed downstairs to get a bottle of water and maybe a little milk. I hesitated when I got it for him, because he is 19 months old. I know this is my own OCD talking in my head, and you know what...I know he'll go back to sleep with it, and it helps him when he is upset. He never took a pacifier, as hard as I tried, so oh well if he wants a bottle when he is upset in the middle of the night. I say that to say, it really does take all kinds. For some reason it made me think of a little girl at my neice's birthday party. My sister told me that this 3 year old, pretty and smart little girl, still slept in a crib. I was asking her when she had put her child in a "big girl bed" and it led to the discussion of this little girl. Her parents think she is safer in a crib, so she still sleeps in one. You'd never know it by looking at her, so obviously the parents can't mess up the kids that much :) Not talking bad about them, because we all do what we think is best. So, somewhere out there someone is saying that about me...because I still give my child a bottle at 19 months. But I've come to realize...oh well...it really does take all kinds :)
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